My Story Part 2: My First Worldview – The mixed bag

What is a worldview?

The Oxford dictionary defines a worldview as a particular philosophy of life or conception of the world.

Today, I know that my worldview affects everything in my life. What I believe to be true and false, right and wrong. I use it to interpret all that exists in and around me. What is possible, what is probable, and what is objectively true.

I was born in the south in a relatively small town. My mother and father took me to church from a small boy. While my mother believed in God and Jesus she never read the Bible at home and never discussed the origin of the universe. My parents believed in evolution. My teachers believed in evolution. My friends believed in evolution. I believed in evolution.

When I was around 9 or 10, I heard a sermon about hell and how Jesus was the only way to heaven. That evening, I asked my dad and mom if I could walk the aisle and get baptized. I raised my hand the next weekend and was baptized shortly thereafter.

Not long after that my father stopped going to church, and did not darken a Baptist church again for many years. I did not read the Bible much through my teenager years though I often thought about God. Even though I did not use the word secular, it best describes how I lived day to day. I believed what I was told through television, whatever was popular, and what I was taught at school.

In college, as I mentioned in my previous article in this series, I majored in geology.  I was drawn to it because of complex processes involved in the earth and universe. 

Did this affect my believe in God?

No. I just compartmentalized science and religion into separate boxes. It seemed obvious at the time that God has simply used evolution. Also, looking back I can see that I rarely read anything other than my textbook and no longer read scripture.

I was married throughout college but ended up divorcing my first wife right before graduation. I felt like this was the best thing to do, but became terribly depressed for some reason. I searched for meaning in my life through friends and other outlets. Remarrying two years later, I became a step-parent/parent of three children. After a brief stable period, a continuous barrage of problems began to consume my life.

Eventually, I began to call out to God for help and started getting support. The more I sought God, the more I began to have hope that things might get better someday.

It would be several more years before a different kind of crisis would shake my trust in evolution. A man named Ian Juby would enter my life, and God would begin to shake my mixed worldview.

Before that could happen though, my beliefs in and about God had to have a foundation to build on.

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